I'm just a simple person. Simple hope. Simple dreams. Simple life. There's nothing that's extraordinary about me really. But there is this one dream I've had as long as I can remember. It is to see The Northern Lights.
I've always loved nature & star gazing. I can make all kinds of shapes with the stars. But those colors. They inspire such beauty & awe deep within me that I relish the day I might actually get to see them.
This year we celebrate 20 years of wedded, uh, togetherness. To tell you that all of those years together had been blissful would be a complete lie. I can tell you however that I love my husband more today than I did yesterday although not as much as I will tomorrow. When you get married at 21 & 18, you most certainly will make mistakes, you tend to be a little selfish & you will argue about the dumbest things. But, if you are committed to each other, you will grow up together & learn what to let go of, when to give in a little & how to love each other with a love that will endure the trials you face.
At the climax of those trials for us, my husband left for a few days to find a place where he felt safe. That place was with MY gma. Since that time they've had this unbreakable bond & she's loved him as one of her very own. She's been one of his most vocal cheerleaders, encouragers & prayer warriors. Countless times I've been woken up by her early morning phone to him just to say, "I love you & I'm praying for you today." Like the rest of us, she pulls him closer, hugs him tighter & reminds him of his eternal identity - Brian, never forget who you are. You are a child of The King.
When gma fell then, it came as no surprise as to where he wanted me to be - with her as he would hold the fort down at home. With a physically demanding job, he has come home after 10-12 hour days in the heat to be mom AND dad because he loves her that much. He loves my momma that much. He loves me that much. He's freely & without complaint given up not one week of vacation but two. Which brings us back to The Aurora......
His intent in scheduling his vacation last October was that we go & celebrate our 20th anniversary in Alaska this week because September is the beginning of Aurora season. He knew that has been my one dream, the one thing I've always wanted to do. Now though, because of circumstances beyond our control he knows that just isn't possible right now. He doesn't love me just enough to live my dreams with me, he loves me enough to hold onto my dreams ever so patiently as every night he holds me close, dries my tears & reminds me of what true love really is. Sacrifice.
Sacrifice comes naturally to no one. Who would tell their stay at home homeschooling wife - Sure, I have been in the heat all day, the house looks like a bomb went off in it & the kids are driving me nuts within the first 5 minutes of being home but I want you to go to your gma's every evening until after I've fed them, gotten them ready for the next day & put them in bed. I'll do the laundry & clean the kitchen. On my week of vacation I'll take the kids to their outside classes & run errands & pick up the groceries so that you can stay home & do something you enjoy. By the way, you look beautiful (with day old clothes on, my hair more in my face than in my pony tail & sweat soaking every inch of my body because I enjoy mowing the yard).....?!?!
The answer is not Prince Charming. He's someone much greater. He is my husband. And no matter what has come, he HAS ALWAYS loved me AND my family. I'm just now beginning to realize exactly how much.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church & gave himself for her....Ephesians 5:25
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