You Would Have Loved Today

In the weeks building up to today, I knew today would be hard. For months Erin has been toiling away, preparing to provide the once in a lifetime day for Hannah as she and Zach start their new life together. The rest of us were merely the supporting cast, praying we could play just a small part in letting the two of them know that we love them and we're going to be here for them through clear skies and storms, through mountaintops and valleys. 

And so, as I started to get ready, I pressed play on a sermon from Esther 8 - "And the walls came tumbling down..." On the way to the church, I prayed for no rain and a gentle breeze. For memories that will make us laugh and smile later on. For all of God's goodness glitter to be showered upon us so that when we look back, we can only see God in the details. 

There were Mawmaw's tablecloths on their bridal table and Nonnie's punch in your punch bowl. I saw your steadfastness on Beth's face as she stood outside the bridal room, without a single tear escaping before the big walk down the aisle. I heard your laugh as Mickie found a small piece of joy in the mix of emotions. I watched Jacob, standing stoically at the back, tears escaping as he was lost in his thoughts. I witnessed the maturity of Cole as he valiantly escorted the grandparents down to the front before our bride would come out. My eyes followed Levi and Sawyer as they played before we started, without a care in the world. 

You would have been laughing and smiling and crying alongside them. 

Then, as the bridal party made its way down to the front, I briefly lost all awareness of those around me as I watched the two babies you met long before we ever knew their names. You would have been so proud of little Elijah as he carried that pillow, having only agreed to do it a couple of days ago. He looks just like his daddy. And tiny Caroline. What can I say? She wanted so badly for those flower petals to land where they were supposed to but the wind just wouldn't cooperate. I could almost hear you laughing with Jackie as Grammy beckoned her onward. Then seeing her smile and dance during the reception, I swear that's what you had to look like at her age too. She also made a new friend this weekend, which no doubt you would have too!

You would have loved today. 

I can only imagine the look on your face as you would have watched your oldest daughter give her oldest daughter away. She and Josh did such an marvelous job. 

You would have been so proud. 

But for me, it was the five minutes I got to spend with Hannah before anyone else got there. I knew that you would have gone to her and prayed with her before things got started today. I knew her momma and daddy would pray with her but who would do it in your stead? In her Gigi's stead? In her G-ma's stead? I knew this morning when I got up what I had to do. With Beth curling her hair, I sat down on the floor in front of her. I took her hands in mine and I thanked God for the gift He gave us in her. I asked God to hold her and Zach close in His arms. I asked Him to help them to communicate with each other and give them courage to reach out when they need help. I cried. Hannah cried. But they weren't sad tears. Not all tears are sad ones, you know?

You would have cried too. 

So even though you weren't with us today, there were little reminders of you everywhere we looked, if only we looked hard enough. Yes, there were bittersweet tears, to deny that would be to lie. But we also remember the legacy you gave us - to live every moment exhaling the love and grace of the God who loves us more than we could ever imagine. 

We can't wait to see you again. 

But until then, I'll pray, echoing the sermon I heard this morning - Lord, keep us running hard after You, confident in Your rich supply of grace and generous display of Your love in our lives.

Help us to tell the story of Jesus in all that we say and do just like those who have gone before us did.